Five Charts That Prove Stocks Only Go Up

by Eloise Williams
Stocks only go up

The only thing I learned while studying for the CFA is stocks only go up. This is simple logic that even a ten year old knows. And if you think stocks go down you are delusional and likely need to be sent to the loony pen.

To prove my point that stocks only go up I have included five price charts of stocks that go up. Please don’t research this topic further. I am highly qualified (CFA, MBA, and PHD (Doctor), and you should take my every word.

Eastman Kodak’s Price Chart:

Eastman Kodak Price Chart

Kodak is a stock that only goes up. In fact, over the past month the stock is up almost a billion percent. I don’t have any price data on this chart for August though as I think that month sucks.

Enron’s Price Chart:

Enron Price Chart

Enron is compounder with a SaaS model. The company is ran by Jeff Skillings a modern day Elon Musk. Enron’s stock price goes up and not down as proven by this price chart. I don’t have any data after 2001 because computers were destroyed in Y2K.

Brazilian Real’s Price Chart:

The Brazilian Real Price Chart

The Brazilian Real is a non-fiat currency backed by gold, bitcoin and Apple stock. I hold millions worth in Brazilian currency because the price continues to go up. Please don’t look at the chart comparing the purchasing power of Brazilian Real to the U.S. Dollar though because your computer will get hacked and someone in Saudi Arabia will steal your wife’s social security number.

Tesla’s Price Chart:

Tesla Price Chart

Elon Musk makes sure Tesla goes up and not down. This will continue to happen over the next 55 years because Musk’s comp package incentizes him to pump the stocks.

S&P 500’s Price Chart:

S&P 500 Price Chart

The S&P 500 is a high quality tech company that doesn’t go down. Please ignore the dips in 2003 and 2009 as those were just glitches and not real.

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